GRIEF CARE: HOW TO SUPPORT THOSE DEALING WITH GRIEF

Losing a loved one is difficult. Someone you cared about and may have even seen on a daily basis is now no longer with you. It’s a drastic change, and it can leave us feeling hopeless. That’s why grief care is important. 

Grief care is a ministry to reach out to people who are hurting. Maybe that is right after the loss of a loved one. But it’s also important when the loss is further away, and they’ve hit one of the difficult times of grief, such as during the holidays.  Having quality care and support is important to the well-being of the grievers. 

How Can You Support Someone During Grief Recovery?

Essentially, grief or bereavement care is providing support, comfort, and encouragement to someone grieving a loss. You do not have to be a professional counselor to participate in grief support activities. Some ways you can help a person dealing with grief and loss include:

• Listening to them when they need to talk to someone
• Sharing encouraging verses from the Bible and reminding them of God’s love for them
• Helping them find the coping strategies that work for them
• Preparing meals for them
• Helping with chores and errands
• Sending them encouraging cards and letters

 When they don’t feel like they must bear the weight of their sadness alone, people can begin to move forward. There will be reminders, and feelings of loss will fluctuate in intensity. But knowing you are in their corner is a great gift.  

When They Grieve a Suicide Loss

Oh, there is so much emotion to cope with when it comes to grieving the death of someone important to you, who “chose” to end their life. It’s never easy to accept the loss of someone you love, but when they mourn this type of loss, their level of complicated grief may be increased significantly. 

We must be especially compassionate with those experiencing grief from this type of death because of the traumatic nature of the loss.

It’s important to support the people who are grieving and remember that suicide was one bad decision in the life of their loved one. It does not define their entire life. It cannot change their salvation status.

How Should I Minister to a Non-Believer?

It’s okay to answer their questions about whether or not you think their loved one is in Heaven and be honest about your beliefs as a Christian. But you should always lead the conversation with love. Remember that God is gracious, and He is far more knowledgeable about where the deceased person is than you are.

If their loved one was not a believer, it is not appropriate to flat-out say that the person who died is in Hell.  We are not to judge.  Instead, keep reminding them that they are loved by a merciful God.  Remind them of the thief on the cross who at the end of his life was promised paradise. 

Grief often makes people look into spiritual things, whether they are Christians or not. Providing aid on the grief journey is a great opportunity to share the gospel with non-believers. It is a time when their hearts are often more open to faith and scripture.

Things to Remember as You Minister to the Grieving

The grief process is one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. Walking alongside people as they work through their loss is not easy. Both of you will experience challenging thoughts and feelings. But the gift of creating a supportive environment for someone to begin taking steps toward healing cannot be underestimated.

Grief Care Requires You to Sacrifice Your Comfort

Talking about death and grief can be messy. It’s often hard to process the loss of a spouse, family member, or friend.

It’s rewarding to see the long-term effects of helping someone through grief, but the initial process can be uncomfortable.

Take a step out of your comfort zone to support the person. Listen to them and really take in what they are saying. Resist the urge to do a lot of the talking and to give advice. Most of the time, the person just needs someone to listen to them with empathy. 

The Rewards of Support: Witness the Healing

Grief support can be rewarding. You often get to see their progress and how your presence has helped them navigate the changes in their reality and gain their life back after the loss.

However, sometimes, when you help someone through grief, you don’t hear from them after the process is over and they truly move forward in life, and that’s okay.

You were meant to be in that person’s life for that season. After you have served your purpose, your relationship with that person may fade.

Grief Care is a Ministry of the Lord

It’s easier to minister to someone who knows the Lord and who believes their loved one was saved. You are able to use scripture to comfort them.

Even if the person is angry at God for their loss and grief, they have a spiritual foundation–something that can be built upon. They may feel anger or resentment, but because the person has put their faith in Jesus as their Savior, there is a basis for encouragement and hope.

If the deceased person was saved, you can remind them that they are in Heaven now and that they can find hope and comfort in knowing that.  If their loved one was not a believer, it is still important to bring gracious Jesus into the conversation.  He is with them in their journey and, in time, will bring healing to the griever’s broken heart.

Resources: Grief Support Group Curriculum 

Here at Hope Beyond Our Grief, we want to equip you to effectively minister to those experiencing a loss. We have many different grief resources to help you be supportive of people going through the grief process. These include a holiday grief seminar and grief support training program.

Please contact us today if you have any more questions about how you can support people through grief.